Like this Monday hasn't sucked enough, I am now getting telemarketing calls on my cell phone.
Yes, let's just ignore the federal Do Not Call list, which federal law requires you to check every 31 days. Also? My phone number went on there in December.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go cry in the arms of my sekrit boyfriend. F'rinstance.
Yes, let's just ignore the federal Do Not Call list, which federal law requires you to check every 31 days. Also? My phone number went on there in December.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go cry in the arms of my sekrit boyfriend. F'rinstance.
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Date: 2006-05-16 04:19 am (UTC)I swear I didn't pay those telemarketers to call you, really!You should like, totally check your e-mail 'cause that would be radical, man.
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Date: 2006-05-16 10:50 pm (UTC)I should certainly hope not. Otherwise I would have to come to Boise to smack you repeatedly with a bag of marshmallows.Okay, man, I totally will an' all.
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Date: 2006-05-17 03:47 am (UTC)Ooooh. Let's make s'mores instead! We'll cook them over the burning telemarketer's body! :DMan, you better.
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Date: 2006-05-18 01:13 am (UTC)Cool! I'll bring the graham crackers!Far out, man.
Telemarketing hyjyngx!
Date: 2006-05-16 01:01 pm (UTC)Seriously, though, telemarketers don't call me anymore. I scare them. Examples:
Got a call from Crown Hill trying to get me to buy a plot. I told them I was immortal and had no need for mortal death rites.
Got a call from a place trying to sell me a car. I told them that I did not need their "demon powered death contraptions".
Got a call from a place trying to sell me magazine supscriptions. I told them I was psychic and knew the stories in their magazine before they were even written. I then tried to read the sales person's mind.
The classic one, though, is that no matter what they are selling, tell them it is against your religion.
"Sir, we would like to offer you a consumer loan..."
"I'm sorry, but I am strictly forbidden from borrowing money."
"What?"
"'Neither a borrower nor a lender be.' Good day.'" *click*
"Sir, can I interest you in these wonderful recipe cards..."
"I'm sorry, but eating food is against my religion."
"Oh, I am so sor... What?"
"'As you eat none, do what thou wilt.' Good day.'" *click*
"Sir, I would like to share with you the love of Jesus Christ..."
"I'm sorry, but my God can kick your God's ass."
And so on...
Re: Telemarketing hyjyngx!
Date: 2006-05-16 10:42 pm (UTC)X-chan's favorite thing was to tell the telemarketers that we couldn't use their product in some fundamental way; she told the cable people that we were blind, the magazine people that we were illiterate, and the credit card people that she was in the process of filing for bankruptcy.
I've often wished I were X.