tee hee actor!crushes lol

[xifeng]

I don't think I have had an actor!crush since I was about thirteen or fourteen, but I rented Amores Perros over the weekend and have now decided that I need to watch as much of Gael García Bernal as possible. In fact, I rewound at several points hoping to get a clear shot of his ass, but no luck. Worst of all, my brain developed an internal monologue about halfway through: "Oh noes! Don't kill Gael!" and "Run, Gael, run!" and all that sort of thing.


l33: You know how there's one person you'd be willing to change your sexual orientation for?
X-chan: Please say it's not Tom Cruise.
l33: God, no.
X-chan: Tom Cruise knows the history of psychiatry.
l33: Okay, X, you win*. Anyway, it's Gael García Bernal.
X-chan: Yeah, he's cute.
(conversation snipped for mindless celebrity gossip and profound discussion of Weasel Geology and Che Guevara and whatnot)
X-chan: Besides, you could take Gael to Los Bravos**. You could be like, "I will buy you a margarita."
l33: I will buy you SEVERAL margaritas! Don't worry, I'm a lesbian!...Mostly.
(rest of conversation snipped because no one wants to hear X-chan advising me on how to attract men)


In non-Gael related news, I mostly watched movies and baked this weekend. We now have chili, bread, and pretzels. HURRAH.


*X-chan and I have this rule that if you yell, "TOM CRUISE KNOWS THE HISTORY OF PSYCHIATRY!!!!!" in the middle of an argument, you automatically win. There is nothing that your opponent can say in response to this. Works best when coming totally out of left field.
**Local Mexican restaurant chain.

Comments

[imperfectkatoru.livejournal.com]

You know that's completely wrong, though. Everyone knows I know the history of psychiatry. And if I didn't, Dusty would.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

Well, of course, but you weren't on national TV bragging about it. Tom was, so he gets more exposure.

Besides, "FRED AND DUSTY KNOW THE HISTORY OF PSYCHIATRY!!!!!" doesn't have the same ring to it. ^_-

[dethorats]

Did you bake pretzels? 0_0
If so, you must tell me how (or I can continue to be lazy and live off the joy that is Utz)!

Naked ass ftw!

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

I did! :D They're an Easter staple at our house, but Mom was rhapsodizing about them earlier, so I made a batch.

I will post the recipe for you. They're soft pretzels, not hard ones, but I guess you could dicker with the recipe and make them extra krispy and krunchety.

N3KK1D 455 R00LZ!

[tara]

I am a Gael virgin, although I have several friends who want to bear his children *g* I tried to tape the Te Tu Mama Tambien or whatever the Spanish is film once because of the hot boy-on-boy action, but our cable was set up to need a password to let us access Films Of An Adult Nature and I didn't know :)

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

It's fun to live in a wonderland of delusion and fantasize about a guy who doesn't know you exist! ;)

I haven't seen Y Tu Mama Tambien yet, but it is on my list. A universe where Molestycakes McHottiepants Gael and hot boy-on-boy action would fail to entertain me is not a world I want to live in. ;)

How mean of your cable D:

[tara]

I find that's the best way to deal with people with boybits. Have big girly star!crushes on famous ones and leave the RL ones alone *g*

AH THAT'S THE NAME!

It is a poo-face, naturally.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

One of my copy bills almost got sent to X-chan, except her forwarding period has expired, and I wanted to know yesterday when I was talking to her whether she'd gotten any stuff that was meant to be for me. X-chan was like, "No, but it was probably all bills and shit so it's not like you wanted it."
l33: But what if Gael cottons on to the fact that I exist? (clutches at straws)
X-chan: He strikes me as a hip kind of guy. He'd probably try the e-mail first.
l33: Huzzah! I'm all over the Int0rwebz, if you know where to look! EVERYONE'S A WINNER! :DDDDD
X-chan: He also strikes me as smart enough to not spell "are" as the letter R.

The X-chan experience works best if you imagine that she's saying even the most ridiculous and improbable shit with a sincere smile and no trace of irony whatsoever. :D

All machines are made of mean. D:

[tara]

But if he isn't a plebe user, does this mean your love is doomed??? o.O

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

Any love in which I am one of the participants is automatically doomed. It's like when you're playing Monopoly and you land on the square that says GO TO JAIL GO DIRECTLY TO JAIL DO NOT PASS GO DO NOT COLLECT $200.

Besides, doomed!love makes for better stories. ^_-

[tara]

I think I have monopoly!syndrome myself. Blasted disease ;)

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

Oh noes, I must have passed it to you. WE ARE SO DOOMED LIKE OUR LOVE D:

[tara]

Oh no! Perhaps this is WHY ourloveissodoomed!

WOE

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

OH NOES! The doom uses the Int0rwebz as its medium of transmission! D:

*flees screaming*
*channels Callice*

ANGST, SUFFERING, MISERY ETC.

[tara]

It's an int0rw3b conspiracy!!! Run for the hills!

Tricky and Callice would get along well. They would compare how they are POOR, POOR pets, bereft of pats and scratches.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

Hurrah for int0rw3bz konspirasey theories!

They would. Callice would like to interject that she can SEE HER RIBS, because I am clearly STARVING HER OMG, and I am also a big poopyface because I shooed her out of the guest room after she peed on the bed AGAIN. I am 3V0L.

[tara]

Gah, the peeing thing is still happening, then? It's a pity you can't just spray your entire house with the stuff that you spray outside to stop cats and dogs weeing where they shouldn't.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

It is, but it's much less frequent than it used to be. We have cat repellent, but it has to be renewed regularly (better yet, she has to be kept out of the guest room). My guess is that she smelled herself on the bed and thought she could wee there (OMG LOL).

[tara]

I think Tricky still thinks that he's allowed to wee in the laundry, because that's where he lived when we first got him and naturally, as a small puppy, he just had newspapers everywhere and he weed indiscriminately all over the place *g* So we have to watch him in there, in case he gets the inclination!

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

We've learned to pick up dirty laundry in the bathroom, because she likes to wee on soft things (maybe she feels like she's burying it?). We've also learned to keep doors shut. I chased her out of the guest room (where my TV lives) on Friday night because I was a-ph33red she would wee under the impression that I couldn't see her, and I didn't let her in at all on Saturday night because GAEL OMG.

I think she lost her mother early. She was a feral kitten, not a pet, when she was turned in to the shelter, and some of her behavior suggests to me that her mother wasn't around to teach her things like How To Bury Wee And Poo, or Bus Engines Are Not A Good Place For Cats To Live.

[tara]

Gah, it's a pity she most likes to wee on the absolute worst things FOR her to wee on. Why doesn't she enjoy weeing on easy-to-clean-tiles, damnit?

That would make sense. With Tricky, it's nothing at all to do with not having older dogs to model and everything to do with the fact that he's (a) a dog and (b) male *g*

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

That would not be convenient, and she IS, after all, a cat. ;) Lotus once deliberately heaved on the hardwood floor, just in time for my father to step in it. :D

Males are the same, no matter the species. *g*

[tara]

BWAHAHA. Oh, I find that far too amusing. And Misty would totally do it, too.

Very very true. It's kind of like Tricky turning into a big baby the moment he has a sore paw or something similar.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

It was beautiful. Lotus never puked on the floor before, and she never did it since. My father jumped around and wailed, rather than cleaning it up. Of course.

[tara]

Hee, just like my own father would do.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

Perhaps it is a universal father!power.

[tara]

The power of squealing like a girl when faced with the prospect of cat vomit!

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

Needless to say, my father was not appreciative when this was pointed out. ;)

[tara]

He was protesting in a manly fashion about the situation, yes?

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

Hah. More like sniping at me for making fun of him. But hey, he asked for it, the girly-man.

[tara]

Now I'm picturing a man in a frock.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

My work here is done! :D