The Dangerous Existence of Madame Lee

I survived Black Friday, which was oddly un-crazy; I only had to ask one person to please move so I could get to the time clock, and the whole event was over by 6:30 in the morning, which really hacked me off (seriously, if I have to be at work by 4:45 in the morning, at least leave me the consolation that it'll go pretty quickly). Due to very little sleep in the preceding forty-eight hours, I told lolmom I would take her to the dealership to get her car (she had new shocks put in) and to please try to be ready to go when I came home. She did not disappoint, though the following conversation was had:

Lolmom: lol btw plz dun panic if u c teh hood in teh kichen iz on & smellz liek sthg burnt :D
l33: Would you like to tell me why it smells like something burnt?
Lolmom: lol k. waz going 2 maek turky s00p
l33: Also, put your seatbelt on or we're not leaving this driveway.
Lolmom: lol k. so i put teh pot on teh burner & then i went in2 liveng room, were i--
l33: --Fell asleep. D:
Lolmom: lol ya. so i didnt waek up until deeler calld 2 tel me car waz redy. but by then s00p waz burnt D: i hoep s00p pot iz ok tho
l33: SWEET JESUS HOW DID THE HOUSE NOT BURN DOWN DDDDD:
Lolmom: lol idk

So yeah, we're pretty much not having any turkey soup this year. Fortunately, she took most of the meat off the carcass before she made blackened turkey carcass with caramelized root vegetables. At least the soup pot has survived, to hold delicious soup at a later date.

Conclusion: Lolmom cannot ever be left unsupervised ever again. Also, if there is a benevolent God, lolmom is obviously being preserved for some very special purpose, on which she is so far behind that she will never die.

Then I slept for 18 hours straight on Friday night/Saturday morning and felt a lot better. Today was pretty anticlimactic; one of the girls came in to work sick, probably contagiously so. I definitely understand her need for money, because none of us are exactly making the big bucks, but sometimes it's more than just you at stake. She was on the pay station for most of the day; Ava wiped it down with Germ-X after Infecto Girl left, but I was still moderately nervous about using it. If I am infected, I will hold Infecto Girl personally responsible for it. I have Big Plans you guys, I cannot be sick. Well, not until Wednesday.

Um. Also, I finally finished The Sunne in Splendour and omg I am grooving on the Wars of the Roses so hard? That's all I can think of at the moment.