Two; Or, "Teen Steam"

[xifeng]

This is a really embarrassing admission to make, but I feel compelled to do so because a.) I am a little bored and b.) the rest of this post will make no sense whatsoever if I don't.


I collect shitty middle and high school girls' book series from the '80s and early-to-mid '90s. Not only do I collect them and have them sitting around in special YA Poo cardboard boxes, I actually read them. I'd like to tell you that I do this "ironically", and I guess there is an element of that; since most of these were not series I read when I was the target age, I can appreciate them as an adult, laugh at some of the ridiculousness, and shake my head without internalizing some of the messages and being damaged. There are other reasons I like them; some of it is the It Was A Simpler Time nostalgia (except it probably wasn't a simpler time), and some of it is that boys and dating and parties and popularity were very much not my life in high school (studying and Communism and mooning over girls who were not interested in me, on the other hand...). Judging by these little nuggets, I wasn't missing anything.

Also, I spend way the hell too much time on bsc_snark, reliving my childhood (because I DID read The Babysitters' Club, oh yes I did), and it occurred to me that there aren't any communities for general YA snark. (There is, of course, 1bruce1 for Sweet Valley High snark.) So I'm stepping up to fill a need by snarking my collection. (This is a need. Trust me. Some of these books are like the most unintentionally hilarious thing EVAR.)

I have a good-sized collection (...three cardboard boxes full), but for now, I'm limiting snarky recaps to series where I have at least five books. This is totally arbitrary, but I think five books in a true series allows you to get to know the characters and setting fairly well. Besides, I'm always scouting for more shitty girls' series, so it's possible that series that I'm not snarking now will be on the chopping block later.

Below, please find a poll and some information about your choices. Remember: your opinion counts, which is why the samurai game is going to be renamed "OMG TICKY BOXES YAY!".

Caprice Romance, Sweet Dreams, and Wildfire YA Romance - The best-known of the lot is Sweet Dreams. These are not true series in that they don't feature recurring characters or storylines that build upon each other; #54 and #55, say, in Sweet Dreams will not have anything to do with each other in terms of characters or plot. They're series only in the sense that they're consecutively numbered. Subject matter is pretty much the same across the three series: girl and guy get together, conquering insuperable obstacles such as shitty grades, the school slut, and the girl's disapproving father. (For an additional twist, in some of these books the girl starts out dating THE WRONG GUY. Gasp!)

Couples - Couples is a true series, in that it does feature recurrent characters and storylines that build upon each other. I haven't read it in yonks, so I'm quite rusty (I know, I'm really making a compelling case here), but the characters are slightly less cliché than many books from this era.

Merivale Mall - Also a true series for the same reason. It follows the adventures of cousins Danielle Sharp (the scheming, gorgeous, rich one) and Lori Randall (the less-affluent, hardworking, sweet one), who play and work, respectively, at the eponymous Merivale Mall. BONUS OVERANALYSIS ROUND: You can work a Marxist angle into this if you so desire.

Sweet Valley High - Oh, come on. You know...Sweet Valley High. I don't know if these books were as popular in Europe as they were in English-speaking countries, so if you're unfamiliar, here's the Wikipedia article. I can't do it justice in a paragraph.

Vote for as many or as few series as you desire. (Or just click the "I love ticky boxes!" selection repeatedly, whatever.) Also: per Burns' Indiana Statutes, be advised that augustuscaesar has to pick another series in addition to SVH or pay a really futile and stupid penalty that I haven't thought of yet.

Without further ado, the poll!

[Poll #1766930]

Comments

[forgottensanity.livejournal.com]

I didn't read many romance books when I was that age - as such. I was way into fantasy. I did read YA fantasy books which was sort of like these series you mention just with, you know, elves and magic and whatever. Can't really recall the titles, though. Oh, wait ... Umm ... Tamora Pierce, I think she's called. I read a lot of her series; I think she fits the bill.

Anyway. The point is that I actually don't know any of the series you've mentioned apart from Sweet Valley High, and I didn't even know Sweet Valley High was a book series and not just a television show until Tara talked about it. So I voted for SVH just because it was the one thing I recognised and ticky boxes, because I love ticky boxes.

I also approve of the new title for your samurai game. It is made of much awesome and I will totally play.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

I didn't, either, though I did read The Babysitters' Club, which is hardly a romance series. XD I read a lot of fantasy and a lot of history and a lot of mythology growing up, and I liked adventure stories and survival stories. I was a strange child.

I read the first few books in the Alanna series by Tamora Pierce, but I remember not finishing it for whatever reason.

I didn't think most of the series would be familiar to you, but they were pretty big here :D I try to cater to my ticky-box-loving audience, though.

The new title should generate interest, I figure. I mean, with a name like OMG TICKY BOXES YAY!, you can't help clicking to see what it's all about.

[mssithy.livejournal.com]

I only recognised Sweet Valley High from the TV show, I never knew there were books :o Still I also chose Merivale Mall because it sounded interesting :|

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

Oh, yeah, the books predated the TV show! I think the TV show was on during the late '90s (at which point I was long past the target age for those books), but I don't remember.

Merivale Mall is pretty fun. :D

[simplypeachy.livejournal.com]

Ticky ticky ticky box box box YAY!

I sometimes think I read your journal because it contains the same essence that mine does: silly.

There's nothing like a heart-to-heart about troubling compulsion, whiney teen romance drama and some ticky boxes.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

HURRAH TICKY BOXES! They'll cure what ails you.

It's not always silly around here. But being dour and glum all the time is no fun. :D

[hatefulsandwich.livejournal.com]

I actually used to find the Sweet Valley High books hilarious. There was a certain sense of humour in there that I could appreciate, even as the dark, intellectual-type teenager I was.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

I find them unintentionally hilarious in a lot of ways, and some of these books (not necessarily SVH) I have to read as comedy or I will be pissed off.

I was a very pretentiously intellectual teenager, so would have turned up my nose at YA poo. I quit reading sci-fi and fantasy for about 2-3 years in there, because as we all know genre fiction is always crap, and in hindsight, I really regret that drought.

[serena-b.livejournal.com]

I picked SVH because it's the only one I'm at all familiar with. And also, oddly enough, another person on my flist reads SVH too...maybe these books are making a comeback, lol.

Oh! I didn't know they had a BSC snark community! I will have to lurk there sometime in the near future. Muahahahaha!

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

Tara is to blame for the SVH stuff. She got me into it. IT'S ALL HER FAULT I TELLS YA.

They do, and it is truly brilliant. Some of them have had me rolling with laughter. :D

[tara]

I would actually be LESS interested in SVH. I have 1bruce1 added, but I've found that I actually heart the series a bit too much for some of the snarking that's out there. It's like, I know the books are SO stupid, but I grew up on it and loved it so deeply that I need to pick and choose what I read about it.

Whereas, although I consumed pretty much every Sweet Dreams there was, I actually hated almost all of them. INTENSELY. And would be all over Sweet Dreams snark :D

I've read Couples as well, but probably only about 1/4 of them. And I'm not sure whether we got all of the rest. Definitely not Merival Mall, which I believe you've spoken about to me in the past. I know the TYPE of book, though, so the snark would still be interesting.

And, in your Fact For The Day, SVH/SVT were reasonably big in Germany, at least, in that they were all published in German translation. They're all in Spanish, too, of course, but I assume that's largely for the Central American market.

[shake-the-stars.livejournal.com]

I can see where you're coming from. A lot of the books I loved when I was growing up were either a.) classic lit/classic children's lit that tends to not get snarked (because if you snark the Iliad YOU HAVE NO SOUL), or b.) stuff that as an adult I can see is hilariously skewed and so I no longer have that kind of emotional connection; I mean, I liked the Babysitters' Club books, but I wouldn't say I loved them deeply (even at 8 or 9, I knew they were not Great Literature *g*). So I don't quite have that thing of needing to be careful what I read about them. I guess I'm just asking for your promise that you won't defriend me for snarking SVH (it'll all be under a cut anyway, so you can skip it if you're afraid I might get too vicious) ;)

There are a few Sweet Dreams that I like okay, but a lot of them are just like...ugh. D: I have only read a few Couples books, and I haven't read any of them in yonks, so I'm quite rusty. I'm glad nobody chose them to be snarked *g* Merivale Mall I actually really like in a way, and yes, I did mention it to you before :D There seem to have been a lot of YA series that only made it out here. WHY DO YOU HATE AUSTRALIA SHITTY YA SERIES PUBLISHERS DDDD:

I did not know this! New education, I haz it! I would guess it to be for the Central/South American market, or else for the large Spanish-speaking population here (in some parts of the country). But it would be a shame if kids in non-Anglophone countries couldn't enjoy the antics of Jessica Wakefield.